Death

One of the pilots that I work with has been unexpectedly gone for a few days. We later found out that his father passed away, with no warning. I'm not sure what happened, but I thought it rude to ask (but prayers are gladly welcomed).

As my coworker and I walked through the hallway, we asked others to sign the card and give $2 or $3 for the fruit basket we sent, we came across a girl who works upstairs. We explained to her what happened, and she gave what cash she had in her wallet. As we handed her the card, she looked at us, and replied, "Can I think about it?" Most people had written a simple "My condolences" and signed underneath. We looked at her in confusion.

"It's okay, you can just sign your name if you don't know what to say." As we said this, she looked up at us and started getting teary eyed.
"No you don't understand. I hate it when people just sign their name. I've seen every kind of death imaginable...murder, helicopter crash, suicide...and I need to write something unique and special. I've been to more than 40 funerals in my lifetime...and it's hard. It needs to be perfect. So yes, I need to think about it." With a concerned face, we responded with,
"I'm so sorry, we didn't know. Yes, we will come back."

As we walked back back to our desks downstairs, we walked in silence, thinking about how personally this girl had taken the death of this man's father. I have only been to one funeral in my life, and I was asked to sit outside of the room where it was being held, in the foyer. (My parents didn't think I was able to handle it, and being an 8 year old, I agreed). That was my grandmother's funeral, and I wasn't even able to see the service. This girl has seen death, she has witnessed it, she has had an affair with it. I've barely held death's hand. I felt so immature when she said it, so young. I haven't been through what this girl has gone through. And yet, she is my age.

Take into account your losses, how do you cope? How can someone go through losing a loved one, and go do their daily activities? I can't personally input my thoughts, because I have no recollection of how it feels to lose someone. Moving past it, accepting it, dealing with the grief? I can't wrap my brain around it.